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So far I have found it is a day to day thing. I am hopeful and do feel some healing. Mine was in California, back in the 70s. Is it just the expectation that the SOs of people in these fields are on the backburner. What a fascinating response as always. You can't gamble on her seeing Mormonism for the shit show that it is. Maybe things would be have different if I had been older or if I had not been so fragile.
And he likes the idea of us raising our daughter with the values the Mormon church instills on their youth. There may be underlying personality similarities, but if the answer to "what shall I do next" is always trumped by a Morman frame of reference for one partner, but not the other, conflict is inevitable. Not in endless discussions of temple marriage, not ever. I understand that, and accept that. As my husband learns about Mormonism I get to see it through his fresh eyes. That said, I like to hope that love can be more powerful than belief. Love does a lot. I never really thought about the sacrifices the wife of a doctor must make. To find another job, a more family oriented one, move to another more financially friendly state we are in California and have a fresh start. It MAY be true that a year in, her shelf will crack and she'll leave with him.